Friday, May 21, 2010

Syndicated Bear

Hi folks,

As part of my publicity and marketing thing for Minder, I'm being syndicated.

Basically, that means I've got to either write a bunch of new material--or drag out some old blog posts and package them as new material. Either way, I've got some work to do.

So, today I'm going to make this a short post and simply offer a

Post a joke, limerick, or funny line in the comments section.
The best one wins a signed copy of Minder. Spread the word!

La R├Ęgles:
(No idea why I felt the need to put that in French. Maybe the coffee I'm drinking is French Roast).

Rule #1: This is open to anyone, anywhere in the world. But, since it'll cost me at least $16 to send a $12.99 book to Australia, it'd better be a REALLY good joke.

Rule B: People of all ages and sensibilities read this blog. Jokes with insinuation are fine, but please keep the
really dirty stuff in your sick, sick mind. (Peter, I'm talking to YOU). I'll have to disqualify and delete any inappropriate entries.

Rule the Third: Please post your entry by midnight (Eastern Time) on Sunday, May 23rd, 2010. I'll announce the winner by noon on Monday the 24th.

Rule Delta: Enter as often as you like.

Rule V: I'm the sole judge, but please feel free to comment on the entries!

"Minder? I don't think you've ever mentioned your book before, Kate. What's it about?"
Link to the Minder Book Trailer


Elie said...

Please don't enter me. I just wanted to let you know that I am enjoying Minder so far, I can't wait to share my review.

Disgruntled Bear said...

Thanks, Elie!

Misty said...

There once was a disgruntl-ed bear
And at his soft bed he would stare
He couldn't quite sleep
Tried counting his sheep
But back at him they would stare!

Disgruntled Bear said...

Thanks, Misty!

Gail said...

Yesterday I was at my local Target buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Sheriff, the Wonder Dog and was in the checkout line when the woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
What did she think I had, an elephant? So since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me.
I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter's behind and a car hit us both.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard. Target won't let me shop there anymore.
Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say

Vicki Rocho said...

Dagnabit. I'm so far behind in my blog reading, I only found this today...the day AFTER the contest ended. It's okay, I can't think of any jokes.

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